Recent and utterly shocking footage released today from a NASA feed television camera revealed a failed plot by an enormous black spider to dismantle and disrupt NASA's Space Shuttle Atlantis' scheduled flight. The giant spider, after numerous failed attempts to breach the shuttle's exoskeleton, soon abandoned its malicious attacks and made a quick getaway on, presumably, a hidden strand of webbing. US intelligence is still investigating the matter and the whereabouts of the perpetrator is still, as of yet, unknown.President Bush, however, made it clear to the American public (once again) that "we cannot wait for the final proof, the smoking gun, that could come in the form of a sticky web." Thus the President has declared an all out war against arachno-fascism and has deployed all of our military resources to all of the states around the world who harbor and are the victims of these 'evil-spinners'. May God be with US.
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